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The idea of dating does not appeal to me in the first place

I'm fat. As previously mentioned, that's a fact and it's not going anywhere. I'm lucky that I'm at a point where that's more than fine -- I rarely fantasise about a perfect, thinner me lurking inside my fat shell who will fix my life if I'm disciplined enuf to let her out. While I consider myself lucky that my fat acceptance happened early, I still believe it wasn't early enuf. 

That I like and value myself and think I deserve things like respect, happiness and love solely because I'm a good enuf person, doesn't mean that's how the world views me. First impressions are a motherfucker and experience has taught me that people's first impression of me as a fat person, is less than stellar.

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This isn't about my "self-esteem" or a lack of it, it's about knowing how people in a fatphobic society think about people who look like me. So, I can dress cute, be funny and charming, show interest and have date etiquette but if someone feels "ambushed" or misled about me being *this* fat, there will be no turning that date into a good experience.  Forget avoiding feeling embarrassed. 

This, going on a blind date as a fat person, has been on my mind for a while because one of my mutuals saw me tweeting about boys -- it's a great way to pass the time on bad days -- and planted a v cute one in my head. Her review him was that he's kind and smart and quirky. Dope. Weeks later she asked if I'd go if she set up a blind date for us. I won't lie, I was intrigued. But that all seeped out of my body upon reading he agreed but he hadn't been told who the date would be with. 

No thanks.

I'm already bad enuf at meeting people who know it's me they're expecting -- that's a social skills thing on my part dashed with anxiety. But there's no worse date scenario (short of being murdered) to me that being around someone who is visibly underwhelmed based on how I look that he isn't even trying to hide it or, like, not be rude. Majina that vibe.

Online dating -- or, just swiping in my case -- has an element of that but I always do my damnest in the written portion in my pictures to let them know (as undeserving as they are) what's up. Now I don't know if letting both people know the basics about the other one, and making sure they're somehow compatible (don't hook me up with bigots pliz) breaks the rules of blind dates but I think it's the least you can do as the "matchmaker." 

My mutual meant well and didn't know know that this is a thing I think about so I let it be. Had she said "Bbz, I sent him this pic and told him you're literally the best person on the planet and he is interested in going with you to a thing of your choosing," I'd have been all over it 👅👅👅 coz wow 😍.


Have you ever been on a blind date? How was it?