28 March 2014

Literally the Best Thing Ever Tracy Chapman's Fast Car

In January when I was going through birthday month feelings I decided to write the following based on Rookie's February theme: Escape


I've always wanted to be anywhere else but here

24 March 2014

Kimye Vitriol is Renewed and in Vogue.

kimye, kimye vogue magazine cover, kanye west and kim kardashian, kim kardashian vogue cover, kanye west in vongue

Don't mind my puffy eyes, bad attitude and more than slightly irritable disposition - I've just come from a long weekend that was gone far too quickly.

On Friday afternoon OOMF retweeted Kanye's tweet of gratitude about his family's Vogue issue. I thought "ncaaaw, he finally got it. They finally got it" and went away from the app. Hours later there were still disgruntled fashion people up and down my timeline (by way of retweets) and I was just like -_____-. The next morning one such disgruntled person (a funny blogger I really like) tweeted how "anyone" could now be on the cover of Vogue. And as expected, when I asked what she was basing this on she referenced Kimye's April cover.

They are not "anyone." He is Kanye West and she's Kim Kardashian. That's hardly pedestrian.

Another person, an online entrepreneur I really respect, was on the issue AGAIN. Stating that if the publication really wanted a two-people cover then they should have featured "equals" citing Bey and Jay, Posh and Becks and Mary Kate and Asheley. I again asked why she thought this particular issue was a stunt that would "alienate core readers" she responded with a mock Vogue cover featuring what I assume is Honey Boo Boo senior stating that it might as well be a future Vogue cover.


I don't know much about reality shows that aren't Survivor or The Amazing Race (Welfare TV woes are endless) but I don't remember hearing that the Honey Boo Boos are into fashun. So, like, how can we then equate Kimye's cover with it being an invitation for all US Weekly cover stars? The couple is not on the cover only because of Kim's family show or Kanye's hip hop career. They're this A-list couple that commands public interest and is seriously vested in fashion.The couple (granted Kim has shown a stronger interest since being with Ye) are into high fashion and enjoy that world, which seemingly refuses to embrace them. Even if it were about Kanye's Hip Hopping... Chile that man is a cultural phenomenon and (sorry for some) so is Kim. Had it been different people the cover would have been lauded and held up as representation for multiracial families, which aren're all that visible in Amerikuuh.

The world just refuses to get over what a consenting Kim Kardashian did ages ago. Far worse, to them, is the fact that she did not cower in shame when a person she trusted released an intimate detail of her life. She did not roll over and die because the world now knew that she had sex. She fucking rose and made an industry out of her name and pretty much created income streams for her whole family. She was in a relationship with that man (though the only thing that should matter is the fact that she consented and enjoyed herself.) Of all the things the world wants shame Kim Kardashian for her only true mistake was trusting a fuckbwoy. Dassit.  And as far as Ye is concerned, to quote the man "No, Kanye, you can't run faster. This is the limit that was made. These are the walls that Michael Jackson, Russel Simmons and Jay-Z broke down for you... This is the end of it."

I have complex thoughts on Kimye's relationship but I don't think about them too much because they do not involve me but the suggestion that they're not equals or aren't as much a power couple as the others mentioned above is a bit yawnfest. I've mentioned before that the framing of 
Beyoncé's sexuality and sexual
expression in the context of Jay-Z and her marital status does a disservice to Beyoncé (married women?) and other women in general. But those are feelings for a whole other day. Is Posh also not viewed as slightly better than other (single) women in the spotlight because she's married (and white?) Can we not pull images of Victoria Adams and shriek "euuuw!"? She was afforded the chance to explore fashion and hone her tastes and is now viewed as an icon. What fashion credentials did she have starting out? She pushed and kept at it and got breaks. Again, this is not about Posh Spice either. These two successful women are not the problem, it's the people who pit them against each other and against Kim who are problematic. As if women can't live, be and express a million different things. Ugh. 

Fashion circles (and it seems some fashion people) are elitist, small-minded, racist and oh so frustrating. I'm just saying check yourself and why you're so offended by a magazine issue that probably won't change a damned thing in your fashion industry. Allow other children to achieve their dreams and stop showing your ass so much. Ask yourself why you want to uphold old "values" of an institution that is so damn exclusionary. Does it make you feel better about yourself constantly seeing people who look just like you, believe in the same stuff and represent your conditioning?

You're allowed to not like Kanye or Kim or the cover. You are. But if your dislike of the issue is because of deeper stuff than "oh it's them? meh" then hhayi ke your issues are sad.

*goes back to not understanding Wintour's cultural impact*

20 March 2014

7 things from this w e e k.

Hello. I've been a McLazy Trousers when it comes to blogging this last while but I reckon someone out there is just dying to find out all about my week and read a list of 7 things that have happened, caught my eye and made me slightly happy or unhappy.

1. It finally happened. It was too terrible.

I have no idea what it means for my already sparse blogging but I hope I'll be able to remedy the situation soon. Yes, I am taking donations and numbers for people selling their previously-loved computers in the greater Johannesburg area. Thanks.

2. This Angel Haze video is so good.

*bobs head up and down like Mrs. George*

3. Solo is on US Bazaar

Best bits:
"I'm not very good at writing songs when I have a lot of clutter in my mind."
"In a lot of ways, emotionally and mentally, I feel far older than 27."
"I've always had an annoying relationship with the term 'tastemaker,' but it's been a defining part of my career for the past couple of years."
Read the interview here.

4. My principles of living happily

What this is is a cartoon about following your dreams and becoming a teacher, the person who cleans father christmas' boots, a portrait artist in central park or a surgeon instead of what everyone else wants you to be. I just identified with this part the most. If all these things in my life were alright then I'd be so fucking happier.

5. Lust Lists.

wishes by nomali featuring ankle booties

I can't decide if this is terribly inspired my deep-seated desires to be Makhathini finally rising to the surface or if I really just like having a broken heart. Of course, these skirts don't come in my size and the shoes are a bit of a debate because in the last while Mr P shoes haven't fit me that comfortably.

6. Video Games

I don't know which version of Video Games I've been listening to but this is not it. This sounds more vulnerable and grittier as a result. I seriously want to crawl into this version. As you may know, my copy of Paradise Edition sits untouched in a pile of my dusty second-hand dvds because I haven't a dvd nor cd player and was unwilling to pub any of my new cds in my now gone Gigabyte. PS Video Games starts at 13 minutes.

7. Yoncé
Yesterday I had this thought... I was wondering what became of someone who came at Bey with a respectability attitude disguised as marketing advice when The Visual Album was being brainstormed. Did Bey hiss "off with their head"? I wonder. You know as well as I do that there was at least one person who came at her and said the album was too sexual. Patriarchy never sleeps, homes.

It's been really great deciding to focus on the positives from each week. It helps me pull back and ask "yeah but what's the good stuff? What made me laugh that one time?"

What's been up with you this past week? What caught your eye? Which one of these 7 things is your favourite?

Thanks for stopping by.

13 March 2014

7 things from this past week.

1. E m o t i o n s

"Bitch you wish I was sorry." The first time I saw this emotions chart for kids and that caption I hollered.

2. Skattie, why are you always sleeping on shit?

I've known about Malibongwe Tyilo's blog for a while and have clicked on it in the past but never really rated it. THEN, gwiqiqi, I clicked on it on Monday or something and I am now obsessed.
 I'm always on the look out for a wonderful side eye reaction image. I'm set for a while with this.
 Goodness I love this so much. I straight up rolled (with laughter) when I first saw this image. It's so complex - well my feelings on it are. Did any of the sci-fi films depicting the early 2k10s even imagine this? I'm obsessed with this image not in that judge-y "we could be getting to know each other and singing Kumbaya" tone but I'm rather fascinated by this compulsion to document.
It's like Gaga at a funeral but really just an awesome babe at a wedding.
All three images by Malibongwe Tyilo

3. Naomi Campbell. In general but specifically in this:

Versace S/S 1998, Menswear
4. Amarachi made me lose my shit on Monday. All of it. Also, do you want to be my sugar daddy? Buy me this dress.

5. This thing I printed in which the writer really just speaks my truff:
"Nothing prevents me from being a writer except laziness. A good writer."

6. Nobody knows what it means but it's provocative.

By nobody I mean myself. I dunno how I ended up following this jawn on Twirra but he sometimes makes me laugh. Even though I don't get this reference it's sounds a bit like magic. FIND ME SWEETNESS.

7. I'm now on Instagram, due the fact that someone really generous is letting me hold their iPhone. It has been such an underwhelming thing so far.

What's been happening in your world this week? Which one of these 7 things are your favourite?

Thank you for stopping by

12 March 2014

Y e e z y.

I Spent this morning's rides to work reading The Kanye Round table on Rookie. So good. I'm listening to this song quite a bit since first hearing it on tumblr when my dashboard was commemoration of The College Drop Out last month.

I forgot to bend your will by insisting you READ the Rookie piece. Read it and come back (or email me) so we can gush about all the excellent bits. kbye

11 March 2014

(not) spring, solange and p a s t e l s.

I've never been much of a pastel person but I'm a bit gaga about this spread Solange did on US Cosmo featuring her new line/project for Puma. It's giving me a serious warm weather saudade even though this past summer wasn't much to speak of. Now it's autumn, it's been raining insistently for over a week and I miss the sun. Solo's new line debuted in February and this feature appears in the March issue of American Cosmo. 

I enjoy the suburban vibe the most. It's a bit of a juxtaposition too, I suppose in that there are no pretty lawns in sight but it still feels burb-y.

One time Puma South Africa sent this to me (in a sort of newsletter) and they've been a want ever since. *sigh*

Sorry about the blurry picsies.

Images, bar for the shoes one, which Puma spammed me with :p

6 March 2014

f e e l s.

I woke up today and remembered one of my dreams perfectly. It was weird because one). I rarely remember my dreams two). 2. I had these two strong yet different feelings from it. Like, when I was first waking up a big part of me was gutted. Then the other part wasn't because it recalled how it had watched the dream unfold (and possibly chatted to the gutted part about the events afterwards?) and had looked on as if to say those Warsan Shire words:

"And if he wants to leave, let him leave" Source

In the dream, this man I really like and I were at a thing, like a restaurant or something. We were in one room. Funny because he's been expertly evasive when I suggested we be in the same room these past few weeks. So in this strange room bro is all "I don't think I can text you anymore." No lie. "I think I'd like to start texting y seriously." The me in the chair was, as I've said, gutted. I think there were tears. Real life sadness, joe. I think those feelings were valid because uhm if you like-like someone and they're just like, "[shrugs] whatever," to your existence it sucks. The interesting part for me, however, is how the part of me that was "watching" the dream behaved. Girl was unmoved. She was just as shrug-y as objects of unrequited love tend to be. I also got the feeling that she was judging the sad, almost weepy me for wanting all these things (in this case to get to sit in more rooms more often with the bro and to keep texting him). It reminds me of something that happened yesterday evening on twitter where this woman tweeted "Loners get lonely too" and I added how much like a betrayal it feels when that happens. Like, you're supposed to be self-sufficient and not need (WANT) one other to keep you entertained and human.

That's what the "watching me" was doing, I suppose. Looking at me as if I were acting like a muggle and clinging onto stuff that isn't there. It's that same part that snickers in public (as if to say "if only you knew, homey.") when I smile at gorgeous dudes and the look past me.  Even I (in dreamspace and low moments?) judge myself for something as basic and human as wanting another human to want me and look at me with an insider's eyes.

In the time I've liked boys (six or seven years) it's only now that I'm learning and beginning to accept that even people you like treat you just the same as everyone else treats you.

I also resolved into tears as I was walking to work with DJ Kent and The Arrows as my soundtrack for no apparent reason. Just let them happen without jumping to find out why.

This quote resonates with me so much. It would have resonated when I was 13 and it resonates today. Fuktup.

“In my family, in my culture, mental illness is especially taboo. Brown girls go to college and do well and get married and have happy families — or if you manage to come from a more liberal background, they find what they love and go after it and that’s that. Brown girls do not have eating disorders. They do not feel sad for no reason. They don’t acknowledge labels like “bipolar” or “manic depressive” or “anxiety disorder.” They don’t seek counselling; as far as brown girls should be concerned, sometimes people feel sad but you figure out why and you fix it and move on.”

Not that this has got anything to do with anything in this current scheme. It's just a giant ball of feelings

5 March 2014

watch that black girl fly.

I know I've bombarded and filled FB with images from the 2014 Oscars - oh, you did not know this fact? Have you liked my FB PAGE? Do it. If you're into that sort of thing, that is. Anyway... Yes, I've spammed FB but I also feel as though I'll forget this moment if I don't catalogue it as I've catalogued stuff I really enjoyed in the past. So here it is. Lupita Nyong'o looking like a dream on the night she received her first Academy Award:

black women in pop culture, misogynoir, lupita nyong'o oscars, can black women live,

Lupita's rise to fame and getting acknowledged by Hollywood as incredible; and being on magazines and talk shows solely to be smart and funny and charming is wonderful. But already there are fuckits using her presence to police other black women in entertainment. Other black women. "Lupita doesn't have a weave and she's famous. OMG, x star who's got a weave should learn that being "fake" does not pay. You should listen to me because I'm a fuckit who makes all the rules and respectability is the wave!!!

All this fuckery is doing is dirtying Lupita's existence and what she represents. Why should women be one way because someone says so? This not only short-changes other women but Lupita herself as well. She'll be expected to stay in this box, this facet of herself we've been privileged to witness these last few months. If these fuckit voices prevail we'll never get to see other aspects of Lupita Nyong'o. Aspects I imagine are just as beautiful and interesting and engaging. This applies to other women in entertainment, other women in life, who are expected to conform to standards set by, yes you guessed it, fuckits. 

Uhm. Ugh. I'm rambling. Remember what Lupita said "Your dreams are valid."

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